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"Say it after me... EM-PA-THY"

When my wife tells me about a problem she is having, I instantly turn into "Mr Fix It". It doesn't matter what the issue is - that hat comes on almost immediately. "Never mind babe, next time what you need to do is..." or "I mean, when they did that, why didn't you just...?" or "Ok, I hear what your saying, to make sure that doesn't happen again..." Now this is a great quality for a job in IT Support however trying to apply the same logic with your lady friend might not be the best idea. Why, I hear you ask? Well, more often than not, our women are not looking for a fix right away - they want you to listen to them and show empathy for what they are going through. She wants you to feel what she is feeling before going anywhere near talk of a solution.


You know how it is, that situation she is dealing with at work, or that issue she is having with her friend, or that point she is trying to make to you that you don't seem to understand, you'll do her more favours by keeping quiet and listening to what she has to say. Take time to understand where she is coming from and stay with her in that place for a while. After some time, then you can think of putting on that red cape and jumping out the window to save your damsel in distress but not right away. It's my hope and prayer that after a while, this more attentive approach towards problem solving becomes part and parcel in how you deal with your woman the next time she comes to you when something is troubling her. In fact, you might want to try this technique with others also. I'd love to hear what difference it makes to those relationships as well. Go on, try it!

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